needed: motivation

I love my current part time job. I saw a purpose to help people, although the job scope is simple. My job revolves around printing statements about peoples assets - mainly their CPF statements (this only the Singaporeans would know), and provide answers to the customers about the several schemes that we have. Come next week I have to learn another new thing, so I am kinda worried about that. However, I am really happy about this job as there is another purpose, except for the money that is. My male supervisor calls the me and the part timers his sheep (小绵羊). I can tell that he is a very nice person, and that he would take care of us. Now I have more reasons to be happy to have such a part time job, and I could not ask for anything more.

Motivation is needed for the learning of programming and doing up my portfolio. These two projects take time, and now I have to work, but I will organize a timetable to do these two things. I have to do these stuff, as it would really benefit for my future, and inculcate more passion for the media industry. That is what I really hope - and I wished someone would push me from the back for this, but now I would have to do that on my own.

Note to self: Draw up timetable for programming and drawing sessions.

PS: I hope that I would have the time to do the two projects, and work harder at my job, and if someone, anyone out there can push me, that would really be a great help.

pissed off..but its over

That boss from the previous job promised to send my paycheck, and she didn't, and I had to text message her to get it. That was like a week after I quit that job, and she didn't have the courtesy to inform me about it, and I had to take the initiative to message her. I had to take half day leave to get it the paycheck. I did not dare to go to the shop alone, and I asked my brother to accompany me, as it was his off-day from work as well. When I got there, I didn't look her in the eyes, as I was still pissed at what her husband and she said about me. I just when to the counter, signed a slip, and she gave me my money for the six days that I worked at that shop. I was kind of happy when I saw her in the shop alone, and that she deserved it. Looks like the pay didn't appeal to anyone, if not I would have seen a new worker at the shop.

I have this friend that I cannot trust at all. She is always late, and it seems that I can't trust her with my things too. She loses them, and I really don't know what to say about her. I feel like I should stop befriending her as she seems like she is acting like a fair-weathered friend that I could somehow be without with. However, if I do so, I would have very little friends. It was somehow because of this that I was relived that I moved to Woodlands to avoid her, and that I would not need to associate with her that often. I don't what to say about her but I hope that she is conscious of her behaviors and attributes. I am somewhat disappointed in her, and I hope to avoid her as often as I can.

Oh well. Life is really like a box of chocolates - from what I can see for myself.

liberation.

Today was the worst day in my entire life. Remember the job that was paying me too low and I was complaining about it? I quit that job today, with fury and tears. Never in my entire life have I been cornered by two repulsive and disgusting individuals, and morally and verbally abused by any other person other than my family members. I am mortified that such people exist, without a care of someone's insecurities, and that they are people who are deaf, and morally incorrigible.

I walked right into the bookshop about 5 minutes to eleven in the morning. The female boss was there, and asked me why I reported for work so early today. I then sat down and told her that I wanted to tender my resignation. She then started asking why, and I told her - the insecurity when I am left to fend for myself, and the fact that I am always stressed at the end of each day as I am unable to balance the accounts. She bombarded me with details of how her other stuff did on the job. Like the hell I care. I went in and out of the shop three times, to let in on the fact that I wanted to quit with effect from today. On the third time I went into the shop, the female boss said that her husband wants to talk to me. I called my Mum, and my sec school buddy for advice, and I kept crying. When her husband came, the female boss text messaged me. I then went into the shop, and they were oblivious to my presence, until I came in front of them at the counter. Still eating their lunch, they talked to me and I broke down.

After humiliating me, I was told to leave my address for a cheque for my salary, and I stormed out of the front door. I cried for minutes, but on the way home when I slept in the bus, I almost forgotten it all.

These was the day I cried the most - all because of these two repulsive,incorrigible, deaf, unreasonable, mindless and selfish people. Luckily I quit the job, and I bloody hope I get the money.

To Lifei: Now I know how you felt when that Doreen lady scolded you. Now I feel the same.

deliberating.

On whether I should quit my current job. I'm only paid S$3.50 per hour, and I do not get extras when I worked on public holidays. I'm also left to fend for myself in the shop - which I am left all alone in for at least 6 hours or more. My buddies from secondary school advised me to quit the job - reason being I might not be able to defend myself if a armed man or woman comes into the shop and attempts a robbery, and that the pay is miserably low. After hearing their worries, I have come to realize these worries and now I'm thinking about it a lot. My buddies told me I could earn more with another job, and with less stress. I also have to travel quite far to get to the bookshop.
Oh well, and I made another boo-boo at work. There was S$100 more in the cash register against the records. I could not balance the accounts, and I was so stressed out and scared, and I have heartburn since I left the shop until now. I'm still thinking and I'm waiting for my Mum to ask her for some advice.

Wish me luck on the balancing of the accounts and on the conclusion of what I intend to do - to quit or not to quit.

feeling young.

My right calf has been cramping for the past few nights, and I have no choice but to wear socks to bed in an air-conditioned room. I felt like a Japanese high school girl where they have socks pulled to their knees. I'm gonna be 19 next month, and I feel old already!

I used to make fun of my Mum as she wore these "old man" socks to sleep. Now it's my turn. The socks do work though, and it didn't give me cramps in my leg that woke me up in the night. Guess I should continue wearing them huh? Sorry Mum, for making fun of you! Back to work tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Cheerios! =)

careless me.

Oh my goodness - the job's killing me. Into my fourth day, and I am still slow at running the cash register. I haven't managed to successfully balance the accounts by myself, until today. I was so happy that I managed to today. The bosses left me in the shop since Friday, and I was struggling here and there, and I find that I am not ready for the whole "myself and the shop" thing. The lady boss doesn't tell me anything! On Friday, she didn't tell me I had to work today (which is a public holiday and Singapore's birthday), and I hope I am paid extra. Today, I also struggled in the shop, and I forgot to throw the bento box from lunch away, and now it should still be in the shop. Yikes. There is still rice, and a slice of watermelon inside, along with some gravy of some sort. I couldn't go back to the shop to retrieve and throw it - the key to the shop was thrown into a mailbox, which I don't have the key to. Sunday the shop is closed, and I am not working on Monday. I think it will rot and give off a foul stench. I text messaged my lady boss but she didn't reply - guess she's pissed, according to my Mum. My Mum was kinda pissed at me, because I kept bringing that matter up, and she got rather agitated. I can't help it - I'm a virgo and virgos tend to harp on things more than your average person! However, she was right, what's done is done, and I can't steal the key from the mailbox with the long ruler and some tape on it - that would be wrong. *sighs* I hope I won't get fired because of a rotting bento box. Yikes!

P.S: Dudes and Gals! Pray for me!

tired.

Reported for work today. I arrived at the bookshop where I was to work about forty minutes earlier. I wandered around the shopping mall, checking out the shops. Then I sat down at a bench quite near the shop. I was a little tired already, as the journey from home to work took such a long time. The female boss said that she would be on time, but she came a few minutes after ten, which was the stipulated time *haha - I win*. I was too early. The day started off with technical stuff, from setting up a laptop to scan book details and to turning on the cash register. Then the heavy stuff came in. The boss brought me around the shop, to talk about the tags on magazines and the books that were for sale and rental. By lunch, I was very dreary, like intoxicated with "i don't know what". After I had my lunch at three (busy with stuff), I was told to arrange books at the end of store. I was wandering around aisles of books, and after a while, I kept looking at my watch - wondering when I could go home. When it was time to get ready to go home, I was told to tally the cash today, and it was scary. I was afraid that I had to fork out money if the amounts do not tally - luckily it did.

Conclusion: A tiring day, and I have to garner more courage to press buttons on the cash register and to greet the customers. Yikes. The boss was nice, I guess there was the fact that she had children around my age - I'm kinda fortunate to have her as my boss. The most funny thing of the day was that I would always jump up to the sound of the cash register every time. Haha...I hope I will get used to the job. I have to start working in the afternoons if I am confirmed for the job. Haha!

Wish me luck!

it might have been me...

Shucks. Yesterday's presentation didn't go so well. I'm afraid I might have dragged the team down. It's because I freaked out, and I didn't know what to do, when the panel of lecturers asked the team to show more of the work that we had done. Yikes, I should had cleaned up and organized my desktop, so that it would be easier to find files on my laptop. I feel so guilty. Shucks. Feeling kinda depressed because of this. I feel so useless all of a sudden. *sigh*


PS: Sorry to my teammates. It could have been me that would drag you guys down in the end.

ai-yai-yai!!

Tomorrow marks the end of the first semester for the year. I'm so excited! At precisely two o'clock tomorrow, I'm declared a free man! (erm..woman in my case) Yipee! However, it's the stress of presentations that make me weak. I gotta get over my fear of public speaking! Shucks. I think the presentation will go well if I am well prepared enough.

Next on the list: I'm starting work on Tuesday!! I'm gonna work at a small bookshop near school. The pay is somehow acceptable, but much less as compared to a job at a bank I did the last time. I will have to undergo training and it looks like I have to handle money!!! Ai-yai-yai! The good side is that I have a bus that goes to and fro from the workplace, so its cool. I get the feeling that I have to work everyday from Tuesday..yikes! I will be so drained out! Oh well, there is not much stress, and I think the job will be a good exposure for me. I should think of the money, although its little!! (like $3.50/hr and plus incentives of which I dunno)

P.S: Wishing myself the best of luck on this one! :P